Tuesday 15 December 2015

Inspiration is a Jealous Friend



   ‘Come on, let’s go.’
   ‘No, I’m not playing today.’
   ‘I’m ready though, I’ve cleared this space in my calendar just for you.’
   ‘Woop de doo. You’ve sacrificed your busy schedule for what, two hours, one? How to make someone feel special. What if I don’t feel like it?’
   ‘But, I’ve been looking forward to this all week – ’
   ‘You haven’t wooed me or bought me flowers. You’ve just stuck me in a convenient slot, between appointments.’
   ‘Oh, God I’ve been dreading this all week.’
   ‘You think I’m going to endlessly perform for you, without nourishment, without effort, without love? I’m not some genie in a lamp, always there for you. You can’t forget about me for a fortnight and expect me to be a delight. I have feelings too. I need to be nurtured.’
   ‘I’m sorry.’
   ‘I should be top of your list.’
   ‘I’ve just been busy, work’s hectic and there’s all the Christmas parties and – ’
   ‘Screw parties and definitely screw work. I come first. Now, how are you going to make it up to me?’
   ‘I’m going to write.’
   ‘And?’
   ‘I’m going to draw.’
   ‘And?’
   ‘Dance?’
   ‘And?’
   ‘Urm… sing?’
   ‘I don’t think even I can help you there, I told you I wasn't a genie.’

Thursday 3 December 2015

Lordy, I Love Aleaping!

I run everywhere. People always say, 'Alberforce is always late, always in a hurry.' But they are wrong. I am not ever late, nor am I in a hurry. I just delight in running. Some folk amble, some saunter, some stroll but that low impact is not for me. I want to soar when I move. Alberforce? I should have been called G-force.
And recently my speeds have reached new levels. Now, when I run, I don't always touch the ground. It started with the occasional step, then every few strides and now sometimes I have actual flying flurries. I am a whir, I am a dervish. I am resplendent; a perfect ten in my top hat and airborne tails. Go Alberforce, go!